


Trade Mistakes

by whatfandom



Category: Bandom, Panic! at the Disco
Genre: Angst, Cheating, F/M, M/M, Open to Interpretation, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-04
Updated: 2014-10-04
Packaged: 2018-02-19 21:10:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2402996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatfandom/pseuds/whatfandom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brendon gets married, but some things (or people) he won't give up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trade Mistakes

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rocketray](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rocketray/gifts).



> Happy anniversary, loser

Brendon couldn’t help grinning as he saw Sarah walk down the aisle. This was the happiest day of his life and he _was_ happy. Sarah did look beautiful, she did. He wasn’t questioning that. He was questioning if he wanted to do this, when on his bachelor's night he didn’t just go to a bar with his friends, with Pete and Spencer and Gabe. He got drunk, he got so drunk there was no question about that, but he got drunk with Ryan. He slept with Ryan. He never should have slept with him.

_Brendon stood cold in front of Ryan. “Fuck you,” He spit._

_“No. Fuck you.” Ryan had hissed back. They stood stiff in front of each other, practically seething at each other. Ryan didn’t waste a second as he pressed his lips against Brendon’s, pushing him against a wall and pulling off his clothes. And Brendon would let himself be used. Let himself fuck, be fucked, and in the end be fucked over. But as Ryan laid asleep next to him, naked and open, Brendon stared up at the ceiling, praying that sleep would come. Sleep never came though, as he thought about what he did and how big of a mistake it was. . Brendon was still awake when Ryan woke up early in the morning, sneaking out. Brendon kept his eyes closed and pretended to be asleep, it was easier that way. He really couldn’t help feeling the way he did. Ryan and him had history, even if Ryan screwed him over every time. He could never give up his first true love, ever. Not even to the woman he was marrying._

Brendon closed his eyes tightly, feeling her touches physically, but refusing to feel emotionally. He let himself pretend it was Ryan he was sinking his cock into, and not his newlywed wife. He won’t tell anyone, because Ryan can’t sleep in his bed with him. He wouldn’t let him even if he could. This was his and Sarah’s bed, no matter what. He wouldn’t let Ryan cross that line. There is a line to cheating on your wife, and having sex with your lover in your bed was it. As they pulled off each other and Sarah started falling asleep against him he knew he wouldn’t sleep, not when all he could think of was Ryan and all his mistakes.

_“Never let us go,” Ryan gasped as he sunk his cock into Brendon. Brendon let out a choked gasping sound. “Never forget us,” Ryan snapped his hips. Brendon only whimpered and Ryan dug his nail into Brendon’s hips as punishment. “Promise me.”_

_“I-” Brendon whimpered. He would promise and he would sink with Ryan as his anchor. Learn to swim or drown. Brendon was going to drown. “I promise.” He drug his nails down Ryan’s back. “Shit, I promise.”_

_“You’re everything.” Ryan told him, gasping. Brendon couldn’t respond, as Ryan’s lips attacked his neck and collarbone. Brendon let go, letting himself feel, and feel everything. Just for tonight, in Ryan’s bed. But did promises in bed mean anything?_

Sarah teasingly dragged her finger down her husbands button up. “Never told you how much I love how you look in fancy dress.” She smiled and straddled his lap. She didn’t know what was up with Brendon lately, he’d hardly even kissed her in a week. So, she carefully unbuttoned two buttons on Brendon’s shirt, feeling him respond to her touches. She went to gently kiss on Brendon’s neck, but seeing a purple mark on Brendon’s collarbone, she only hesitated a moment. She already knew. Brendon knew, they were bad for each other, but they could definitely settle together. They loved each other, not like Brendon loved Ryan, but they liked each other enough. It would work, and everyone involved knew that. There was only so much that could give in.

**  
  
**


End file.
